the Selfishness of Telling

I've been reading a book from my Minister about Spiritual formation and teens.
Something in the book has struck me...

The selfishness of telling.
This kind of links back to a previous post: http://little-thoughts-on-a-big-book.blogspot.com.au/2013/09/what-makes-good-youth-group-according.html

There is a problem within some churches that nobody really realises exists. That is... more telling happens than pacing. This book I'm reading talks about an idea called pacing. That is meeting someone where they are at. Instead of having someone come to you and you just TELL them the whole gospel and exactly what to do, you have to listen.

LISTEN!

Meet someone where they are at, listen to them. Get in their head, think about what it would be like to walk in their shoes (cliché I know but its true!). Pacing means having patience and empathy. Its about forming relationships and telling little bits at a time. There's no point coming to someone and blabbing tones of information when they aren't even in the position to take it on.

Don't be selfish!

Telling is selfish because it only satisfies you - the person who is doing the telling.
The point of pacing is to serve the other person. Which is exactly what we are called to do!
When we meet someone at their level we can form bonds and trust. Then God really reveals where the TELLING is appropriate. Then God really starts working.

Isn't this exactly what God does with us?

I believe it is. Its been like that in my life. Many times I've gone through something and people haven't been here for me, instead they've just told me what to do. Then a few years later I remember what they've said what its actually applicable. Which is still a wonder of God! When I really think about it I would rather have been forming relationships with those people who TOLD me. I would rather have had them to listen to me and sit with me and comfort me.

So people don't be selfish and tell!  Think about if you were that person and what emotional needs they may have. Develop some patience! It's a fruit of the spirit.

Discipleship is what we're about... so lets go out and DISCIPLE THIS WORLD!

And remember...
 GOD'S TIMING IS BEST!

He will let you know when the timing is right. Don't go running in!

Blessings!

Also the book is here: http://www.amazon.com/Shaping-Spiritual-Life-Students-Ministers/dp/0830822844